Just passed the 22^nd week. My mornings start out with sore hips and lower back. I either crawl on the floor and practice some yoga moves or have Michael dig his thumbs into my back for relief. I find that staying active at the gym or walking about makes the soreness stay away for most of the day.  I’m about to sign on for some pre-natal massages, which should help with my alignment and get these hips ready for natural birth. Natural birth. Let’s talk about that, shall we?

Michael and I decided at get-go to do everything possible to go with a natural birth. I am amazed as to how many women do NOT research various options for birth. When I’m at a party or talk to women who’ve had children, I get shock when I say I don’t want an epidural. I also get, ‘wow you’re brave’. I’m not trying to be brave – I’m trying to do the natural thing and let my little girl be born when SHE is ready to be born. This means:

• No scheduled inducements
• No C-section, unless in an emergency
• No Pitocin, which leads to faster contractions, which leads to an epidural
• No episiotomies, if I can help it
• No freaking out if I’m at 40 weeks and my little girl isn’t here yet (did you know that the French actually say that most first time births go 41 weeks anyway?)

I’ve been reading quite a bit, including ‘Your Best Birth’. You just can’t beat the facts. From doctors that schedule C-Sections so they can enjoy their holidays or leave the hospital at a decent time to delivery by forceps because the baby is in duress from the epidural – it all happens.

Birth is such a natural thing and the Europeans seem to have this down – the American medical world does not. I’m using a midwife because I want that specialized treatment of someone who specializes in natural childbirth. I am going to use a doula because I want to have someone by my side to help with natural positions to help our little girl glide through the birth canal. If there is an emergency situation where a C-section or a form of drug is needed to help, then I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. Until then, birth should not be rushed. Period.

I am so surprised by how quickly women judge your decisions – without even knowing you or reading multiple sources of research. As many of you know, my husband is a Sommelier. Sure, my house is surrounded by wine, but I haven’t really touched the stuff since I learned I was pregnant.  Just this weekend, I attended the Windy City Wine Festival with my hubby. Yes, this was a wine festival and yes, because I also received a press pass, I was given a wine glass. Michael and I discussed me sampling some wine, then spitting it into the handy spittoons at each station. That never happened.

There I was, walking around a wine festival, pregnant. I was getting glares from so many women – I couldn’t stand it. The glass in my hand was empty and I was following my husband around to his favorite wineries. I decided that as strong as I was, I didn’t want to endure any other judgmental faces. I returned to the entrance of the wine festival, returned the glass and had the workers place a special bracelet on my wrist, indicating I wasn’t drinking.  All of this to stop the sharp whispers of women around me.

Before I continue, let’s get something straight:

• I never intended to drink any wine
• I was going to sip, this spit
• I could actually have had a few sips, but our American culture is so backwards that I’m sure I would have been attacked

We returned home and Michael went to work. He’s as much of a research nut as I am and we have countless European friends whose wives drank now and then while pregnant. I’m talking one glass of wine a week – not copious amounts of vino per day.  Within seconds, Michael found a UK study about how a small glass of wine per week actually helps the baby. Quotes I found interesting:

“They found that children born to women who said they drank 'a glass of wine' very occasionally or up to two drinks once a week throughout pregnancy were less likely to have conduct problems, hyperactivity and emotional problems than children of abstainers.”

My point here is that there are multiple trains of thought on the subject and I’m in the camp that believes that having a small glass of wine once a week, later in pregnancy, won’t be detrimental to the baby.

Being pregnant really solidifies my belief in the lack of knowledge women have about their bodies, pregnancy options and what doctors want versus what is right for you and baby. To the women at the wine festival who sneered at me as I strolled by with my husband, I’m sorry my baby bump and empty glass took your time away from enjoying a lovely day in Chicago, but instead you had to waste 10 minutes of your day questioning my instincts. And yes, I heard what you said behind my back as I walked by.

You’re lucky my protective husband didn’t hear it.